"being foolish, stupid and rude since 2002"

First 50 Keep and A Grade Poeta
November 4th, 2009 by Darkane

It's been a fruitful....err, fruity sounds gay...let's start over...

It's been a Dongtastic week for PfB.

We managed to grab the first 50 fort for Asmodians on Zikel. It was certaintly a faction wide effort; we just happened to frontload the most 50s and DPS on the fortress guardian. It's about time too, we've been lagging so hard as a faction in accomplishing anything, but I guess that's what you get when every hardcore/active guild goes Elyos and leaves us with nothing to work with.

Continuing on with our lolpveness: After a few B grade runs we finally received an A grade. The final boss for A grade is a less powerful version of Tahabata Pyrelord, but he still kicks ass, our only advice is to kill him before he enrages. :/

Aion Progression
October 28th, 2009 by Darkane

One month in and things are looking good. Our roster contains the most 50s of any guild on any server (as far as I have seen). We have multiple groups running the end-game instances everyday as well as rifting/abyss for PvP, multiple expert crafters for every tradeskill, and several people already attaining their level 50 Daevonian pieces.

We ran our first successful Dark Poeta today and managed a C Grade, easily could have gotten B if we had just killed a few more mobs :/.

However, we do have a few complaints about the game:

1. Loot doesn't always drop off bosses.

2. Everything is a massive grind and/or moneysink.

3. Asmodian version of pretty much everything is unreasonably harder than the Elyos equilavent.

4. Zikel Asmodians are fucking terrible. There are no hardcore guilds, other than us, and it makes fortress raids very frusterating.

Don't get me wrong Aion can be very enjoyable. The PvP is very good and the Dredgion has been a blast. Aion is exactly what I said it would be many months ago; a good game to play til something better comes along.

On a final note, we are raising our recruitment level requirement to 50.

Aion Release Server/Race
September 8th, 2009 by Darkane

Server: Zikel

Race: Asmodian

The planets have aligned and we finally came down to a decision. Elyos and Asmodian are virtually identical with only very subtle differences. In the end in came down to a few stubborn members insisting on having claws and a mane (maybe they are furries?).

Server choice was much more difficult as this has more impact on overall quality than anything else. We worked with a few other established pvp guilds to decide on Zikel. We are aiming to make this server a one stop destination for competitive pvp with a strong emphasis on group vs group. Make no mistake though, we fully intend on participating and leading large faction raids on fortresses and other areas. For more information on our server choice and the guilds that will be playing on Zikel, check out the thread on UI.

Finally, as release is just around the corner and we will be opening up our recruitment process once again. This is where alot of guilds will say shit like, "If you think you have what it takes...blah blah," fuck that, you probably don't have what it takes so don't even bother.

Our new squeeze: Aion
July 30th, 2009 by Darkane

Okay, I confess, I am a lazy bastard, it's been 7 months since I updated this page (who reads this anyway?).

In truth, there really hasn't been much going on since the last update. Everyone has been floating around from game to game. Even Darkfall was a miserable failure that I refused to play when I hard rebooted 5 times at the end of their EU beta, although we had a few running around with The Regulators. We had a Left 4 Dead team do very well in league matches, Xanath still heads that operation up. We even dabbled in UOWoW; a private shard that emulated many of the original UO concepts (ffa pvp, looting, etc), which was fun for a little awhile. I, of course, played every asian beta I could get my hands on, which leads us to the topic of interest...Aion.

I will be blunt, Aion is not the messiah of MMO gaming. Aion will not be the pvp haven we all crave so much. Aion will not, most likely, be a game everyone stays in for the next couple years. Aion is, however, a very stable and clean game; it runs smooth with gorgeous graphics, fluid movement and gameplay, and above all it has decent PvP (better than wow, worse than daoc). The game is fun and enjoyable, I do see myself residing in Aion until SC2, D3, and SW:TOR is released.

That being said, PfB will be officially making a presence in Aion. Our server/race has yet to be determined, but our plans are forthcoming. We hope to land with a sizable force of 30-40 players (No, we aren't LotD). We encourage all old members to join up and help us beat the shit out of some anime loving faggots.

Happy Holidays and Other Shit
December 22, 2008 by Darkane

Warhammer was a bust. The game resembles WoW far too much to be enjoyable when it is compounded by bugs and imbalances across the board. No one really got into and we only ended up with a handful of 40's (which would be awesome if it was beer), so most /quit and went on to other things.

Everyone is screwing around in different games at the moment. We have a few in WoW playing on the Tichondrious server with Notorious. Wrath of the Lich King is a very solid game, very fun and casual, perfect for the time being. We also have a group playing Left 4 Dead league games, I haven't picked it up yet myself, but I hear it is an amazing game.

The only real news is that Darkfall is actually coming out, really, it is I swear. The beta has been underway for awhile now and the mass majority of testers are raving about it. It is rare to see a game that caters to the niche of hardcore players to be spoken so highly of in a beta test. This is good news, but I remain skeptical. Release is scheduled for the 1st quarter of '09 (so probably the 2nd). I know I will be there day one and I am sure many of the crew will show up as well. Darkfall is supposed to be the Hail Mary of PvP games and we all want to see it succeed, but it has been so long in development that doubt clouds over everyone. There won't even be a NA release in the foreseeable future, everything is going to be Euro focused. We'll update the site as more solid information is released, as well as the open beta which is rumored to be within the next month. Keep your fingers crossed.

Happy Holidays to everyone!

P.S. Karnel has a vagina.

Could Warhammer Be The Future?
September 13th, 2008 by Darkane

Here we are once again at the doorstep to a MMO's release. Needless to say that AoC bombed, all the warnings I gave in beta about untested end-game content fell on deaf ears. It was pretty disheartening as I was very excited for that game, although that excitement may have been inflated by the free trip to Norway. I didn't even have the heart to close up shop and decided to make a clean break and just go live life for a couple months. I want to thank all our friends in AoC and apologize that the game didn't turn out the way we had hoped.

Warhammer officially begins tomorrow morning and I can't say I am overly thrilled. I have a bad gut feeling that the game will become stale and old. I'm not a huge fan of the combat system nor the graphic style since it too closely resembles WoW. However, Mythic knows their shit, they know how to beta test, they know how to balance. I always knew this game would offer great pvp, but at what cost? I don't know, but I am willing to find out and so is PfB.

We will be up bright and early Sunday morning to begin the Collector's Edition Headstart on Skull Throne, a Core ruleset server. We won't be hosting any guilds as guests and our membership was cut down to a bare minimum. We tried the big guild thing and it just wasn't for us, in WAR we are opting to stay small and elite as before AoC. There is no need for big guilds in WAR, which is nice, since as a realm we work together to accomplish the larger goals.

We chose Order as we feel Destruction will have the majority of players and Order will house the smaller more organized guilds. In the end, when it comes to realm warfare I don't want deal with the clusterfuck and rely instead on competent guilds to achieve victory. I had that headache on Archimonde when we rolled alliance, ugh the nightmares still haunt me.

Anyway, we hope to see some of our old friends and enemies on Skull Throne. It's shaping up to be a nice competitive server as you can see from a list Fistina has been maintaining here: Skull Throne Guild List

See you on the battlefield!

Mass Suspensions Screwing Major Guilds
May 29th, 2008 by Darkane

It's all about the gold.

One of the major selling points and drives for Age of Conan is the Borderlands and their associated Border Keeps. This is where all the major guilds on your server will be competing for 1 of 8 siegable cities, large fortifications that will house upgrades for your player cities and bonuses for your guild the longer you hold them.

It's a long road to be able to take a border keep, you need to attain a tier 3 player city beforehand. This requires a major effort on your guilds part, pooling of resources and gold in order to quickly progress through the city tiers. Now, originally, Funcom had a bank/guild bank/AH/postbox NPC (yes, all together) to help with the organization of this effort, but with many things at launch this became broken and disabled for a week. In the meantime, as any respectable guild would do, we pooled our resources by hand and designated one person to hold these resources and gold. Being the guild leader for AoC this person was me, as I was also the architect for the guild. I continually collected most of the gold our players earned which was alot of gold considering we were fielding the highest leveled players on the server, of the first ten level 80s we had six of them.

The patch finally arrived that was to fix guild banks and upon logging in I noticed that all the gold I had was gone, every last tin. I had over 30 gold at the time so you can imagine my shock. I /petition and wait in a 70 man queue for an hour when I was disconnected by the server. I am now unable to login. About an hour later I receive an email from Funcom:

Hail and well met adventurer!

The Funcom team would like to thank you for becoming part of the Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures experience. As you can guess, this is a very busy time for us at Funcom. We are constantly working to improve our systems to make the experience for you, the customer, more enjoyable.

In our efforts to make improvements, mistakes are occasionally made which can affect our customer base. We try to minimize the impact of all such issues as much as possible, but unfortunately sometimes the issue in question is so volatile that it cannot easily be contained to a select few accounts.

Recently an exploit was discovered that allowed certain individuals to generate large sums of money well beyond the normal amounts expected for this stage in the game’s lifecycle. We will be removing the ill-gotten currency from the system in order to ensure that the economy of Hyboria remains stable for the rest of its law-abiding denizens.

Due to the nature of the exploit, we are not able divulge any details, but at this time your account has been suspended while we investigate. If you feel that this incorrectly affected your character, please send an e-mail containing your character name, account name and server to account-status@ageofconan.com. Only e-mails pertaining to this issue will be answered.

Thank you for your understanding



Pretty absurd, no?

At first the email address they gave didn't even work, and I had to send off several emails to various funcom addresses and PM's to devs and QA people on the boards. Only one ever got back to me and I greatly appreciate his help. I then resorted to posting all over the official boards, beta boards, and random gaming boards trying to draw attention this; that Funcom mass suspended players with an excess of gold to try and cover up a gold dupe or exploit of some kind. Many guilds were slapped with the same thing, having their guild leader or money holder stripped of their gold and suspended, guilds like Sinister, Darkhand, Rising Arms, PfB (thats us), Lords of the Dead (no suspension just gold wipe), and many more smaller guilds from all servers.

The worst part about all of this is the lack of communication between Funcom and the playerbase. We have no idea what is going on half the time, and especially in this case. Scores of people sent Funcom replies to their suspensions, I myself have sent multiple emails to multiple addresses everyday, and not until today, 3 days later did we receive a reply:


Your account is still under investigation. Sorry for the delay.




Funcom Customer Support

Timely and informative response, eh?

Where is our community manager? Why isn't he getting involved in this and help sort out the glaring errors made by Funcom? This game is still under launch status and to screw up massive suspensions by sweeping players who had over 10g (random guess here) into the exploiters catagory is absolutely unacceptable. This is a major concern and the root issue isn't the suspensions, it's the lack of Customer Service. This isn't 1999, MMO's are no longer in thier infant stage, the community has an expectation level that is not currently being met. This is a billion dollar industry that revolves around the interaction between company and consumer.

I have faith in Funcom to rectify this situation, they did great and amazing things getting people involved in their release. I, myself, was able to experience their enthusiasm by being flown to Oslo to participate in their launch party, which was amazing amounts of fun and you can read about that trip here.

The ball is in your hands now Funcom. What are you going to do with it?

If you would like to comment on this article, visit the discussion about this on the AoC Source forums.

Boobs, Blood, and PvP
May 25th, 2008 by Darkane

It's now a full week after launch (counting the 3 day headstart) and things are looking great. Age of Conan is the game to be playing right now, and Deathwhisper is the server to be on.

We dove right into the game and have continually been one step ahead of the competition. We are proud to house the first 80 on the server, Socratic, and he was quickly joined by 6 more PfB. We created the first player keep and most likely finished all the tier 1 buildings before anyone else, though that one is hard to know for sure. We are well on our way to take the first battle keep and maintain dominance on the server.

We are still focused on leveling, PfB leaves no man behind. We have taken over Kheshatta, the highest level zone and have consistently maintained control in the zone expelling guilds like DDH, The Box (lolterrible), and Wetdream.

All in all, we are having a blast in a true FFA PvP game. We hope to see more balance in the future and a harsher death penalty, but for now we are just rolling around and raping kids. See you on Deathwhisper.

Age of Warhammer?
Jan 30th, 2008 by Darkane

Age of Conan? Or Warhammer Online?

2008 is going to be the year of MMO, with both aforementioned games set to be released and the next World of Warcraft Expansion. PfB is laying the groundwork for the next big game, we are contacting all ex and current members to come back and get ready to rape faces as a team once again. We are gearing up for either game, Conan or Warhammer (Most likely Conan), depending on how each game goes during their respective betas. We want to go full force into the next big PvP game, doing what we do better than anyone, and I think Sidonis put it best:

"a bunch of people who like to roll around and rape kids"

Hell yeah. It's time to get back into a game with real PvP.

Fury: Day 4
Sep 9, 2007 by Karnel

Now, lets see how this is going to come out...

Its a game... with pvp... you have lag... its beta... moderate grind... Destroyers are IMBA... Im always LFG... kids chase me around objectives for days while I just heal... Its a decent game. Alright, Ill say it. I like the game and I wish I could find a decent group to play with.

World of Gearcraft
Aug 26, 2007 by Karnel

Does one really have 10 hours a day of free time to invest into a fucking video game? I did once, but fuck, I had to grow up. The fact that I have to sit back and watch fat, bitch-ass kids(or better yet, adults) make money in this game because they A) can communicate to other fellow nerds in a peaceful manner B) Are little bitch fufu faggots C) can stand grinding gear for fuckallever in a game full of zit-faced, bitch-titted van-halen t-shirt wearing habitual masturbating nerdocracy having cunts. Case in point: It's unacceptable that this kid probably has 5x the gear I do, yet even with .02% the skill, he could probably keyboard around with one hand while shoving handfuls of cheetos into his mouth and still come out on top.

Ive come to a point in my gaming career where I can either sit back and become a shitbag spectator who plays or suck it up and kiss some netpower hungry fat fucks ass to get on a Professional team again.

Don't get me wrong, time does equate into actuall skill but thats about 2% when you have been playing as long as I have. So, I have decided to hang up my hat and sell my warlock for a dime bags worth of cash, pack my shit up and move to a new game.

Next game for PFB?
Aug 25, 2007 by Karnel

Since any and all games on the horizon are either gay knockoff remakes or promise too much and will probably deliver shit on a rope. Since I am the only member that actually does shit constructivly for my guild. Ill be posting my future game interests below.

Conan is looking good but I have yet to play it. Warhammer has a long way to go but its a decent game so far. Lich King expansion looks like the asshole of a gay man that used a pogo stick upside down for an hour straight.